League of Legends Rito Disclaimer

So I play League of Legends and like a lot of people who play I've probably spent a bit too much time on it for how long I've owned the game. But hey I'd like to think I'm fairly experienced at League so here's a slightly serious disclaimer Rito should make to the buttons to warn people of what they are getting into:
Match me with teammates: ***WARNING*** You may experience the following during play:

1. Flamming premades
2. Apparent Diamond/Platinum Smurfs
3. Afks/Feeders
4. Role Playing Jungle Clans
5. People copying things they see in streams/youtube and feeding, [1] [2] [3]
6. Junglers who stay in the jungle exclusively
7. Insta-locking
8. People who "won't/cant" support
9. Asshole adc's
10. People who troll to punish trolls
11. A complete loss of the outdoors
12. 100% Self Life Steal 
13. "I only lost cause you didn't gank"
14. OMG THIS JUNGLER IS NOOB HE DIDN'T GIVE ME BLUE
15. OMG THIS MIDLANER IS NOOB HE LOST THE BLUE
16. Duo-Top Laners
17. Nidalee Support
18. People who want to surrender to early
19. People who won't surrender a clearly lost game
20. People who take wraiths after an ace
21. Teemo
22. X is a noob champion
23. "This lag....."
24. People who flash in the spawn
25. A 100% rise in blood pressure and irritability
26. Actual Server Lag [EUW]
27. French Summoners (Just Kidding ^.^)
28. AP riven
29. "OMFG NO SS"
30. Reported

I will invite my own teammates: ***WARNING*** You may experience the following during play:

1. Irritation and flamming premade syndrome
2. People mad because you're only ganking for your premade
3. People mad cause you're stopping the surrender vote
4. People mad cause you're bringing your bronze friend into a Gold ranked game
5. People mad cause you're pushing bot when they're taking mid inhibitor

Oh yeah and 

1.  Ranked League Games

But All that aside League is a fun game that I would recommend trying at least.
[Here's a link if you want to sign up to League]

Average Day In a Draft Que

Have a nice day summoners
Russ